Ha ha....sorry for the silliness. I know, I know....I am a professional writer, I shouldn't indulge in these emotions. (NOT)So why am I doing a Happy Dance? Well, for all of my aspiring author friends, I received the first copy of my book over the weekend! Yes, a physical copy of the story I have been shackled to for the past couple of years. And let me tell you--IT IS AMAZING!!!!
I cannot believe this day has arrived. I am one step away from being a ... bum bad da dum...Published Author!
How cool is that?! The funny thing is that it feels so surreal.
I remember the first day when my character was nothing more than a private joke--forged from the depths of a lost soul with tons of newly useless information stored inside her brain. All of the hardships and pain squeezed until they popped into a final moment of absolute clarity. The day Bea was born.
Who is Bea? Well, Bea was actually Ruby...but, of course, I had to change her name. Why? Well, she is a part of me, and she deserved the initial of my last name--which eventually turned into Beatrice.
What are you talking about? Did you have too much to drink?
Nope, I am just giddy!
For those of you unfamiliar with Bea--she is a Retired Tooth Fairy who collects adult teeth; but there is only one problem--those easy-to-collect teeth aren't so easy to collect! And Bea isn't the best at collecting them. She finds herself in many precarious situations. And thus, my series follows her misadventures as a retired tooth fairy.
Alright, time to return from my little detour.
I can still remember the first day when my character was nothing more than a private joke. My daughter joyfully chuckled as we joked about the most unlikely tooth fairy. After we were done, I jotted everything down (in the worst chicken-scratch handwriting imaginable).
I brainstormed.....
I outlined.....
I sketched.....
And I returned with a very cranky-looking old fairy who was more scary than whimsical. Yikes!
Back to the drawing board.
So I brainstormed....
And sketched some more.....
Until my retired tooth fairy aged gracefully....and looks kind of like a funky librarian. But none the less, she was evolving into the beloved character she is today.
After putting Bea together with a pencil, I decided to add words to her mouth with my pen. Soon, she jumped off the paper and told me about the time she tied herself to a tooth, which then yanked her behind it after an unfortunate magical mistake. After that, we became best buddies! She shared her embarrassing moments, and I told her about the time I....(oh wait...this is public...I don't think I want to share that story).
But then, of course, the "First Timer's Curse" grabbed ahold of me.
...wait, what?....you've never heard of the "First-Timer's Curse"?
Well, my friend, the "First Timer's Curse" is when someone begins to do something creative, but then....it strikes......the worst case of self-doubt imaginable--Am I good enough? Is this good enough? What if no one likes my story? What if no one likes me? What if I get a wedgie while at a formal gathering?
Yes, it is the worst curse ever---even worse than that curse placed on those poor Chicago Cubs! It has devoured many poor souls at the start of their journeys. Such a sad thing. And it almost got me, too!
But, I was too determined. I grabbed a hold of my inner strength....the strength I never thought I had...and I continued on...until....well, until this weekend when I held my work in my hands for the first time.....oh, I love the smell of crisp, newly printed pages smooshed in between the shiny glossy cover featuring my hard work.
And, of course, I look at it and cannot believe I drew the pictures or wrote those words. Absolutely crazy good!
But why does this make me feel so happy?
Well, I remember the days of people telling me that "I don't belong" and the hardships I had faced. The utter depression of losing everything I had loved. Feeling like a loser or unimportant. I remember the struggles, and the unattainable dreams.
But, I don't regret my past because my past has shaped me into who I am, and has led me to this place in my life. And honestly....for the first time, I feel like I belong! I have accomplished something big!
So yes, I am going to do my Happy Dance....
And you can do one of your own too--Just believe in yourself. The journey is only as hard as your first step. And never ever for one second stop dreaming!
Okay, that's enough lip-service from me! I am going to snuggle next to my book, and dream of a brighter future for my family.
Best Wishes Everyone!!
~Jaclyn
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